Being in a romantic relationship is such a wonderful emotional ride but when the relationship comes to the end of the line, it seems hard to move on and accept that it’s really over.
Even if you try to make things easier, the pain is often just too heavy to bear. You will catch yourself on a downward spiral that leads many into depression, and you leave an impression of casual indifference on things that used to matter.
For many people, even when they agree to part ways because they both know it’s the best thing to do, it is often painful.
Especially when you have shared years of experiences and memories together.
Moving on is not always an easy thing to do. For many it takes time to recover.
Even when breakups are one of the most unpleasant emotional experiences, there are things you can do to help ease this life transition:
Fully Experiencing the Pain
When pain strikes, our instinct is to avoid it. We distract ourselves with other tasks while suppressing the pain. This doesn’t actually make the pain go away.
“What we resist, persists.” The best way to deal with the pain is by fully facing it.
Closing your eyes, fully experience that feeling of sharp pain within your being, and become the observer of that pain within you. Separate the observer from the pain.
There is more that you can do however, and it will take a moment of reflection and more to consider…
Even when you feel in your heart that parting ways is the best thing to do, one of the reasons it is so painful is because you were used to living and sharing good and bad moments with that other person.
But sometimes a relationship can be toxic and nothing good can come out of that. However, there is one good thing: What lesson did you learn?
Find the Lesson
What did you learn through this relationship? I’m a big believer that good can come out of every situation, even ones we’ve perceived as bad.
Focus on what you’ve gained in life lessons that you wouldn’t have learned otherwise.
Some say that time heals all wounds, and although you will have a period of grief, and sadness, time does help.
After the initial shock has sunk in and you’ve had plenty of communication with your ex, take time to be separated from your ex partner. It’s hard to gain clarity, perspectives and independence while being reminded of them constantly.
I recommend taking a few weeks to be apart: no meeting, no emails, no phone calls. With time, you will heal.
Don’t fall into a dark hole. When you focus on the sadness, and keep dwelling on it, will only take longer to heal. There is nothing wrong with crying, it’s a way to begin to release this energy and heal.
But it’s importan to begin to focus on positive things after this.
Surround Yourself with Positive Energy
Be surrounded by friends and family. Be around happy and optimistic people. Be around people you like. Be around people who can make you laugh.