Many people suffer from high levels of anxiety, (almost on a daily basis) from one thing or another.
And their pain is very often times misunderstood by those of us who live with them and interact with them all the time.
The following is a list of some of the things an anxious person truly feels but is not always able to or know how to communicate it.
A lot of compassion and understanding must exist in those people who love or care about a highly anxious person.
One thing I have always said before when you deal with negative or pessimistic people (who anxious people are often mistaken for) is that sometimes we need to love them enough to allow them to find their own way when they are ready.
I don’t think a person with high levels of anxiety is necessarily negative or pessimistic, but many times they do need to accept that they need professional help especially if nothing seems to improve or change for the better.
It is really hard to attempt to change a person and succeed at it. This is because for real change to happen, it has to start with the person who needs the help accepting that they need in the first place.
Once that happens, real change can begin.
From a person who suffered high levels of anxiety, speaking for everyone who suffers from it…
It’s not always about you
For the most part it has nothing to do with the person an anxious person loves, but there are often times when it is hard to deal with it or simply don’t know how to deal with it.
This can create a lot of confusion for the loved one, this is why it is important to have understanding and compassion.
It can be pretty exhausting ruminating about everything we possibly have done wrong, are doing wrong, or could do wrong.
We may want to sit and cry sometimes. We may be uninterested in our activities. We may snap at you, even though you absolutely don’t deserve it.
We may even get nervous that you don’t love us anymore, even if you’ve given us no indication of this.
We want you to know above all else that it doesn’t have to do with you. It’s not your fault.
We love you, and we’re so, so sorry if we ever give the impression that we don’t. We just don’t love our brain right now, and we don’t know how to deal with it.
Please don’t try to talk us out of the way we are feeling right now
Listening and being there is key. Sometimes an anxious person simply needs to be listened to. When we try to talk them out of it has the potential to do more harm instead of good.
Trying to relieve us of our fear or sadness might seem like a good idea.
And sometimes, it is. In fact, we might even ask you if we have any reason to be worried, so that we can try to combat that irrational part of us that is constantly afraid.
But there’s a fine line between trying to help us and trying to talk us out of it.
Never tell us that our worries don’t exist, or that we can get over it if we just stop thinking about it.
All that does is make us feel like we’re broken—that there’s something wrong with us that even our closest loved ones don’t understand.
Part of our fears may be irrational, but it’s hard to let go of the part that isn’t
They know that their fears are irrational in part, but can’t always let go or simply just don’t know how to let go of the part they are unsure about or is actually rational.
Sure, we know that the embarrassing thing we said wasn’t really all that embarrassing, and it probably didn’t influence anyone’s opinions of us whatsoever, and that the entire group we were with today probably isn’t talking about how terrible we are behind our backs.
We know how ridiculous that sounds, and it sounds even more ridiculous saying it out loud.
But that other part of us. . .that’s where anxiety lives.
That’s where it can stay, feeding on us, popping out its head occasionally to remind us that it’s still there.
That’s the part that always reminds us, “What if this time, my worries are correct?”
We appreciate and are grateful for you
They really are grateful for having someone there who understands and loves them, and they truly appreciate that as well as the good things they have in their life.
But it’s just hard for them because the anxiety gets a strong grip and they can’t always help it.
Often, anxious people are labeled as pessimists. And that’s actually quite understandable.
We’re pretty talented at coming to the worst possible conclusion almost instantaneously.
But that’s not always who we are. In fact, many of us are pretty optimistic between anxiety bouts.
We do love our life, and we are grateful for what we have, and we are especially grateful for you. We don’t mean to focus on the negative, but sometimes, we can’t help it.
Know we always appreciate you. You are the light at the end of our tunnel.
You are the one who tries your hardest to understand, who knows us in and out and still is willing to stay.
As you can see, highly anxious people need a lot of love, understanding, and just being there. It doesn’t mean they don’t care, that they are just pessimistic and negative.
Anxiety could be caused by a combination of chemicals in the body, hormones, and overall mental health, which includes past traumas.
Many things contribute to improving a healthier mental state which then affects the rest of the body. A combination of what we eat, and healing past difficult experiences. This often needs professional help in addition to lifestyle changes.