Lack of tolerance and patience among people, create unnecessary disagreements, leading to arguments. Some people argue by shouting at each other, while others avoid conversation and contact all together. Irrespective of the method used, the end result of an argument is usually the same –people get hurt and disappointed.
Effective communication of emotions is an important skill to have in order to avoid arguments. One key aspect of this is being aware of and in control of your own emotions. Before trying to communicate your emotions to someone else, take a moment to pause and assess your own emotional state. Make sure that you are calm and collected before engaging in a conversation with the other person.
Once you are in control of your own emotions, it is important to listen actively to the other person and try to understand their perspective. This can help to prevent misunderstandings and avoid escalating the situation into an argument. It is also helpful to use “I” statements, which can help to express your own emotions and needs without attacking the other person. For example, instead of saying “you always make me angry,” you could say “I feel angry when I feel like I am not being heard.” This allows the other person to understand your perspective without feeling attacked.
By taking a step back to remove your defensive self and coming from a place of compassion, you’ll avoid emotional damage, and improve communication between you and your loved ones. Use these tips to help you avoid emotional arguments:
Talk About Your Feelings Before Getting Angry
Most arguments can easily be avoided if you make the people around you understand how you feel. Deal with the situation as it happens by talking about your feelings when you’re offended by what someone says or does. And be quick to forgive those who have wronged you when they ask you for forgiveness. It’s one of the best ways to avoid emotional outbursts and live a happy life.
Speak Softly, Gently and Calmly Towards A Solution
It’s important that you don’t speak with an aggressive, sarcastic or loud tone during an argument. When you raise you voice towards your partner, he will certainly follow suit and yell even louder. As a result, both of you will become even angrier, turning the argument into a screaming contest, rather than dealing with the issues at hand. In the end, your communication and relationship will be damaged.
If this isn’t what you want to happen, then try to speaking with the people around you calmly during arguments, with the intention of solving the problem. By speaking gently and calmly, you’re sending a message to the other person that you truly want to resolve the matter at hand. It’s highly likely that he or she will also calm down, and the two of you will talk things over, and come to an agreement.
Don’t Bring Up Issues From The Past
Arguments can sometimes remind you of a similar issue that happened in the past. Maybe, your partner cheated on you several months ago, and you forgave him (but you didn’t forget). Then, you argue about something totally different, he walks out on you, and you see him through the window flirting with the pretty girl next door.
You’ll definitely feel jealous and angry, thinking that he’s probably cheating on you again. For the sake of saving your relationship, don’t bring the issue up, as it will only make things worse. Instead, focus on finding a solution to the current problem. If you’re convinced that he may be cheating with her, ask him calmly about it another time.
Agree To Disagree
Sometimes, you and your partner may not agree on certain issues during an argument. Under such circumstances, it’s better to simply agree to disagree. After all, it’s better to be happy in a relationship than to be right. Learning to compromise to resolve your differences will go a long way in improving communication between you and your partner.
Overall, relationships are meant to be enjoyed, and not endured. However, constant arguments due to disagreements can cause pain, disappointment and sadness. Use these tips to help you avoid emotional disagreements, and bring back the much-needed peace and happiness into your relationship.