Blog Relationships

When A Negative Spouse Or Partner Makes Life Less Than Enjoyable

angry unhappy couple

Being in a relationship with a spouse or partner who is constantly negative can easily develop into a daily living hell.

It can turn ugly very quickly, not to mention it also makes you feel unloved, unappreciated, disrespected, sad and lonely at times if not most of the time.

The only things keeping you there in the relationship is your love for the individual and the hope that things will become different some day.

You cannot stay in denial. You have to realize that there are two fundamental things to realize:

1. You cannot change your partner

2. Your partner needs to be willing to want to make an effort to make things better

Sadly, the hard truth is your partner wont change and neither will your relationship unless you seek professional counseling and you both desire to find away to make your relationship work and be happy as a couple.

How can professional counseling sensations help resolve negativity in a relationship?

Visiting a professional relationship therapist can help resolve negativity in a relationship by giving the couple a safe spot to talk things out in a calming manner directly to each other while the therapist provides guidance and possible solutions to fix the problematic situations in the relationship.

It can also help you discover the underlying reasons why your partner is being so negative.

What could be the reasons why my partner is being so negative?

There are a number of reasons, here are a few just to give you some perspective:

Career or job related issues, financial struggles, death of a love one, struggling with an addiction, constant infighting, two-family troubles, loss of a home, struggles with past childhood, abuse situations, family problems, physical or mental abuse in the relationship, loss of identity, depression, and betrayal.

Can knowing why a partner or spouse is being negative stop the negativity?

Knowing the exact reason your partner or spouse is being negative can stop the negativity if the problem is discovered and worked out with forgiveness, understanding, compassion, respect and most importantly unconditional love.

Without all this, a relationship could continue going down a negative path where nothing is resolved and you both wind up being constantly unhappy and miserable.

What do you do if your partner does not want to see a professional therapist?

If your partner does not want to see a professional relationship therapist to discuss what is bothering them you could try sitting down with your loved one and have a deep talk with them.

Find a comfortable and quiet environment, for some people however,  it is perhaps better to find a public place such as a park, where no screaming and yelling can occur. Whichever environment you feel is best make sure all your electronics and gadgets are off such as cell phones, iPads and laptops.

Nothing is worse than trying to have a conversation with your partner to discuss important matters and having an electronic device go off.

The reason why a public place is a good place to talk to your partner is that you are not likely to want to pick a fight out in public.

Instead, if the atmosphere is right you and your partner will end up wanting to talk with each other and discuss why there is so much negativity going on.

Perhaps you and your partner or spouse will come to a resolution on how to mend and ease the chaos in the household.

It could also help you two reconnect and rekindle your relationship so you can be happier and healthier beings for one another.

The important thing here is to be able to communicate in a clear and non-judgmental manner.

What to do if your spouse or partner is still negative after therapy and talking?

If your unsure what to do when your partner is still being negative after a therapy session or talking, it may be time to find away to pursue your own happiness and leave the individual behind.

Negative individuals who don’t want to work it out will only cause unhappiness and grief not only for themselves, but others around them, especially you.

There is no need for a happy person to be with a negative one.

It only causes distress and chaos. Heck, even taking a break from the situation for a little while and revisiting it later on when your spouse or partner is in better spirits could also be an option.

However, it is wise to only go back when your partner or spouse is ready and willing to accept responsibility for/and change their own behavior.

It’s important to keep in mind that when your partner or spouse is being negative you don’t have to be with them.

This will only enable them to continue being negative.

Instead, be upbeat and happy and insist on the individual seeking help to improve his or her mood and your relationship for a better happier life.

Always remember that when you have tried all you can and have put your part to no avail…

Sometimes it is best to let them go, and you have to love them enough to allow them to find their own way.

Photo credit:  Vic