What would go through your mind if someone picked up on your child, harassed you at the grocery store, or passed harsh judgment on you? It’s probably not very pleasant is it? If you agree with this then why would you continue to allow your inner voice in your head to take over in the same manner.
Why do you give in to being your own bully when you know better? This is something that many of us are guilty of doing when we are overly critical of ourselves for every perceived failure or mistake.
It is natural to feel that there are areas of our abilities, attitudes, personalities, or even looks that may need some work from time to time. This dose of constructive criticism is beneficial because it encourages us to improve ourselves and become the finest versions of ourselves that we can be. If, on the other hand, you repeatedly tell yourself that you are not good enough, that you are worthless, or that you are a failure, this will wear away at your sense of self-worth, confidence, and mental tranquility, which will slow down your growth.
It’s possible that you’re being hard on yourself because you shared a joke that none of your friends found humorous, or because you came to work an hour late (and people made fun of you) because you forgot about the light-savings hour change. Either way, you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.
When it comes to self-love, we can all be our own worst bullies. We’re constantly putting ourselves down, comparing ourselves to others, and finding fault in everything we do.
It’s time to stop the negative self-talk and start being our own best friends.
Remember, these are some of the quick points to help you get started:
- Be mindful of your thoughts
- Challenge your negative beliefs
- Practice self-compassion
- Seek out positive role model
- Speak kindly to yourself
- Take care of your body
- Give yourself credit
- Be patient with yourself
- Set realistic goals
- Celebrate your successes
Know that it is not worth it to be overly critical of oneself, regardless of the reasons that lead you to do so. You’re just setting yourself up to suffer in the end. Therefore, rather than ruminating over your past mistakes, why not take what you’ve learned from them and move on with your life? These methods can help you silence the bully that lives inside of you and become the finest possible version of yourself:
Focus More On Positive Self Talk
Make the decision right now to put an end to the self-criticism you engage in whenever things turn out the way you anticipated they would. Instead, give yourself credit for your accomplishments and compliments whenever you do something positive, regardless of how insignificant the accomplishment may seem. You should make it a habit, at the end of each day, to sit down and write down at least five things that made you happy or things that you did well, and then read them to yourself (if it’s not too embarrassing) before you go to sleep. This practice, when done on a regular basis, can assist you in becoming less critical of yourself and more accepting of who you are.
Be Kinder To Yourself
It is often far simpler for many of us to be good to others than it is to be kind to ourselves. We express our love for other people by telling them how much we love them, praising them when they achieve success, and even forgiving them when they make mistakes. But when it comes to us, there is a separate set of guidelines to follow.
When was the last time you looked in the mirror and said something positive to yourself, such as “I love you” or “I have forgiven you”? It is quite unlikely that the majority of us will ever have engaged in this activity during the course of our lives. Even if some of our routines aren’t the healthiest, you and I need to learn to treat ourselves with more compassion as soon as possible. Let’s be more tolerant of the fallibilities that come with being human, work on improving our self-care, and become better at learning to love and accept ourselves exactly as we are.
Consider Mistakes to Be Opportunities for Learning
Each of us is unique and possesses a number of strengths, in addition to a number of areas in which we may grow. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and view them as opportunities to learn and grow as a person rather than as reasons to beat yourself up. This will help you move forward in life and become a better version of yourself.
Exercise Some Patience With Yourself
Self-criticism is a deeply ingrained, destructive habit that requires time and a significant amount of work to change. Therefore, show yourself some compassion while you work to alter your way of thinking and cultivate more positive ways of talking to yourself. First and foremost, you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself if your performance isn’t as good as you had hoped. Because you are a human being, it is natural for you to make mistakes as you go along.
It’s natural to have negative thoughts about ourselves from time to time, but if you find that you are consistently being your own worst bully, it can be harmful to your mental health and well-being. Here are a few more quick tips you can try to stop being your own worst bully:
Practice self-compassion: Instead of being critical of yourself, try to be kind and understanding towards yourself. Remember that everyone makes mistakes and it’s okay to be imperfect.
- Challenge negative thoughts: When you have a negative thought about yourself, try to question its validity. Is this thought really true? Is it helpful? Is there evidence to support it or contradict it?
- Seek support: It can be helpful to talk to someone you trust about your negative thoughts and feelings. This can be a friend, family member, or a mental health professional.
- Take care of yourself: Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well, and engaging in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Taking care of your physical and emotional well-being can help you feel better about yourself.
- Practice gratitude: Focus on the things you appreciate about yourself and your life. This can help shift your focus away from negative thoughts and towards a more positive outlook.
Remember that it takes time and effort to change negative thought patterns, but with practice and self-compassion, it is possible to stop being your own worst bully.
In general, you should aim to be your own best friend rather than your own worst critic. Choose to be your own best friend. This will bring about a significant increase in both your happiness and your health.